Yes, I can take a joke. That just wasnt funny

people first follow me and then they ORDER, yes literally order, me to follow themselves and their friends

Joey: THATS HOW MUCH OUR PHONE BILL COSTS!? Chandler: Thats the phone Number...

''Why are you talking during my lesson?'' ... ''Why are you teaching during my conversation?''

❝ Booty Shorts. Uggs. & A Hoodie. You Weather Confused Whore, WTF Are You Doing!? ❞

Joey: THATS HOW MUCH OUR PHONE BILL COSTS!? Chandler: Thats the phone Number...

Click Like And Then Ctrl W And Your Facbook Page Will Turn Neon Colors

excuse me. excuse me. EXCUSE ME. OMG MOVE!!!!!!

we all have a facebook friend who adds a status just to get attention..!!!!

My bed is suddendly so much more comfortable when I hear my alarm ring at 6 AM

.: 1 universe, 9 planets, 204 countries, 5 continents, 809 islands, 7 seas ... and I had the privilege to meet you

.: Tall guy + Short girl = cute. but Short guy + Tall girl = really awkward.

.: that song you always skip but never delete off your music.

.: We Used To Talk Till 3am...Now Im Lucky To Get A Hello..

.: like this if you think 2010 is going fassst.

INDIA!!!!Coooooooooome Ooooooon!!!!!Jai Hind...

.: Trying to say goodbye to someone & 15 minutes later your still talking!

Today India will show the world what Indians are capable of even with shoddy governance...may the Opening Ceremony be a huge success!

Can miles truly separate you from friends... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there?

the more you work , the more you gain

.: ''Okay, bye''... ''Wait'' ... ''What?''... ''I love you''. ''I love you too''.

.: Why do all my best ideas come at night when I am trying to sleep?!

.: My kids are my world!!!!!!! If you feel the same press like!!

.: The best way to avoid disappointment is to not expect anything from anyone.

Movie-The Social Network-is getting rave reviews. Now if everyone on facebook were to see the movie once...500million X ticket price!!

did you kno that if u shake your head and say gullible at the same time it sounds like your saying orange... :P :P

''Sorry can we just be friends?'' is like saying ''The dog died but can we keep it?''

.: Teenagers are either drunk, stoned, texting, having s*x, or asleep.

There's 6,697,254,041 people in the world but i want you :) ♥

♥ I LOVE your smile, specially when i'm the reason behind it.. ♥

I wish I could grow weed on farmville and sell it on mafia wars.

☆If someone you know lies to everyone around them and you think they are not lying to you, you are just lying to yourself.

Every year, I realize how stupid I was the year before.

Every Relationship starts as a friendship

A girl calls 911 operator:911,whats your emergency?girl:MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE!!!operator:where do you live?girl:IN THE HOUSE THATS ON FIRE

.: Every house has a .. ''smell''.. to it...except your own :)

Love has no boundations, It doesn't fade coz of lack popularity, Love find its own path, i guess you can say its ''LAWLESs''

Laying in bed, remembering a conversation in your head, and imagining what you should've said instead..

"Don't go I need you in my life..." LOL jk, close the door on your way out :)

.: Yes, I can take a joke. That just wasnt funny.

My wife caled me a ''sm*g little cu*t'' yesterday.I just got out of the house and drove away.. in my new mercedes.. 19 inch r*ms

Scientists claim that coffee is more addictive than Heroin.........Bollocks....I'm not addicted to coffee and I drink it all the time.

.: putting earphones in my ears, turning the volume up and completely drowning out the rest of the world.